When we were children, we believed we could do anything. We were unstoppable with great imaginations.
If we watched superman, we thought we could fly and would try to. We would put on a towel or some other made up cape, tying it around our necks or pinning it to our shoulders. How many of us would stand on top of furniture and take a great leap, not thinking about what would happen when we landed?
Do you remember trusting and believing in yourself, so much that after watching a cartoon character, we could outrun any and everything? For those old enough, we once truly believed in the power of spinach after watching Popeye. We knew it would make us strong and powerful so we could take on anything, especially the Brutus’ in our lives. We were fearless. We had high hopes and dreams for our future, even if no one believed in them. Then at some point, we were taught that we must face the “reality” that none of which we thought was true. We were forced to “grow up and live in the real world,” where we must take on the education, beliefs, career paths, and realities of what our society says you must do to live and survive. All the hopes and dreams of a child were snatched from you as you took on a new beginning to fit into societal norms.
I had an interesting conversation several weeks ago, with a new friend and colleague. We were discussing how and why my organization, DeeCilla Comfort Center, focuses on restoring hope in the lives of those we serve. The organization’s mission directly correlates with the focus of much of my writings and speaking engagements – helping people live in purpose and on purpose. I shared how I understand and believe that in each of us lies unique gifts. These gifts we have when used properly have the ability to change lives, our and our communities. When asked why I believed many do not use or tap into their gifts using them to fulfill purpose, I shared a little of what I mentioned earlier – we lost the hopes, dreams, and faith we had as children. As children, while we have the ideas of taking on the world, this also becomes diminished when those we love and trust disapprove of our dreams, causing us to lose hope. As we grow and continue to connect with others, we build trust with, the cycle continues. We still seek approval to accomplish those things we desire within our hearts.
A friend shared, on Facebook, one day – What did you want to be when you grew up, and what are you doing now? I found not only the question interesting but, more so, the responses. As children, these adults had grand ideas of what they wanted to accomplish; however, many were also doing something very contrary. I wondered why and even thought of my own life. As a child, I wanted to be a doctor or lawyer. My aunt asked me why, after sharing how ambitious that was. In a child’s explanation and understanding, I basically shared how I wanted to help those who were sick or hurting but also help those who couldn’t speak for themselves. I wanted to ensure justice was served for those who were hurting.
Just like most, I have had those in my life I trusted, but some would encourage that ambitious child, while others could not see past their personal fears, limitations, and disbeliefs. Thankfully, I had the right people in my life that believed that whatever was placed in my heart as a child was there for a reason and encouraged me to do what, sometimes, I thought was impossible or odd to myself and others.
Having the right people in my life helped me to hold on that childlike faith, but more importantly, help me open my mind to understand how I could do what the child wanted in my adult life.
While I am not a doctor or lawyer, my childlike knowledge of wanting to help others who are hurting and provide justice grew to an understanding of the many ways this was possible. Never would I have imagined I would be the founder and Director of a faith-based nonprofit that is helping to change the lives of many every day. I am grateful to those who did not let me lose faith and hope along this journey to get here. Yes, I have experienced heartache, heartbreak, and my share of difficulties, but losing complete hope and faith was not an option. Yes, there were times I wanted to give up, especially when I was faced with thoughts and reminders of the years of abuse I endured. At times, I was told by some that I would never amount to anything. I experienced bullying by both peers and adults who I believed should have protected and loved me. Yet, I am grateful for those I met along my journey, who would not let me get stuck in the shadow of the beliefs and limitations of others. Grateful for those who pushed me and would not let me give up even in my hard and dark times. They understood the value of helping me find the light…a glimpse of hope. Oddly enough, I am grateful for all the bullies and naysayers that have been in my life. Little did they know, they were only pushing me to greatness as well. Now, I get to use my life as a testament that hope is not lost; we just need the right people in our lives to help us hold on to it, despite our obstacles.
I look at young men like my brother and my son, who also believed in accomplishing great things in their life. Their dreams who seem impossible to many, and thus have caused many to tell them such. Too often, they would encounter people who worked to live according to societal norms, going with the flow, and ultimately giving up on their hopes and dreams. These people would encourage them to give up, try something different, seek alternative options because what they were working to achieve was just too hard, or would cause them heartache and heartbreak.
People failed to understand the passion that lies within these young men to accomplish great things that could change the lives of many. Because of such passion and purpose, the journey ahead would come with individual trials and pangs. They would stumble along the way, want to give up, and sometimes stop believing what they were working towards was not possible. At times, hope would fade as they would start believing that they, too, had to take on societal norms and follow the journey of so many others, especially other young men. This would cause these young men to begin living their lives for others, rather than following the passion that was burning deep inside and giving up on their dreams.
I am grateful to be a part of both my son’s and my brother’s life, sharing with them the importance of not giving up on their dreams. Yes, they too at early ages experienced their share of trials and pangs, at times distorting their vision along their journey, but having the right people in their lives, to help form that hedge of protection for them and their dreams has proven vital. My brother wanted to be a wrestler since he was a child, and people would laugh. Later he became a pro-wrestler and is now pouring into young men who share a similar dream. My son has always wanted to be a doctor, loved animals, and had a gift for technology. After studying computer and electrical engineering AND veterinary science, he is now a Doctor of Veterinary Medicine candidate at Purdue University. This is also the school he dreamed of attending, as a young person in middle school. He also has used his gift to help others by creating a computer-based study program for other students and working on being published in a journal by conducting research that combines all of his studies. Interesting that many often shrugged at the idea of what he was studying, with remarks that it did not make sense and did not go together. I am grateful for those who kept and keep him encouraged despite the naysayers and unbelievers.
Helping our young people hold on to their faith, hopes, and dreams is more important than we sometimes realize. Understandably, at times we lose faith and hope because of what we see in front of us, or due to our limitations, but we also must be honest and know what these limitations are and why they exist. In doing so, we can ensure the right people are connected to our youth to keep them encouraged, so we do not become their barrier to accomplishing greatness the way they see it. Yes, we can become the barrier and roadblock in the lives of our youth, if we are not mindful. We lost hope and faith in accomplishing whatever we wanted to as children, but that does not mean we must diminish the light of hope and faith for the next generation. Allow our children to maintain their childlike faith. The child that once thought they could fly maybe your next pilot, astronaut, our engineer. The child who believed spinach would make them healthy like Popeye and take on Brutus may be the person who understands the importance of health and wellness. They may become your next doctor, nutritionist, or trainer to help others build self-confidence to also accomplish greatness.
We should never underestimate the passion and faith in the mind of a child. Perhaps, as we begin to see limitations, we should start to take a look inside ourselves to understand why we believe these barriers exist. Are we still faced with boundaries because we are fearful of not adapting to societal norms? Do we believe so much in the normal that we cannot see the possibilities of abnormal dreams that can accomplish the unbelievable, unimaginable, and unthinkable? Be mindful of sowing seeds of self-doubt in the minds of our youth and encourage them to hold on to childlike faith. The faith that says, I can do all things. I can do whatever I set my heart and mind to. Protect the dreams of our children, and more importantly, perhaps, now is the time to reconnect with your childhood dreams. Maybe it is now the time to reconnect with your inner child and discover why and when you lost hope and faith…when you gave up on you, to become the person others believed you should be.
Break the cycle of dropping your dreams to live the life others desire for you. Break the cycle of giving up on you, to be loved and accepted by others.
Break the cycle of caring more about what others think and believe that you lose yourself.
Break the cycle of giving up on yourself
Break the cycle of losing hope and faith…
Restore childlike faith and believe you can fly, be strong, and take on the world.
We need more change-makers in this world. Those who will push past what others believe so real change can take place.
Moving forward, will you be a catalyst for change or a barrier…a roadblock to those with a vision to utilize their gifts to change the lives of others for years to come?
Have your registered for Let’s Journey Together? We begin on Tuesday evening at 7 pm. Reconnect with your inner child. Renew your faith in your dreams to help those you love. Register at https://zoom.us/meeting/register/v5crcuqrqTwoi-iGfkJf9sgzdxrdH13d5Q
